B.R.A.

ME: GOOD MORNING MISTER. MIND INTRODUCING YOURSELF?

BRA: Hello, my awesome name is Bryan Yap, but my friends call me bra for no apparent reason. I am 13+4 years young and I live in a country far away from Sri Lanka, above Indonesia, below Thailand. I am an alien.

ME: Well hi alien. Why are you hugging a tree? Do you love it?

BRA: Like, DUH. And sunglasses. I'm addicted to them.

ME: I saw you at the beginning of the year. Y U LOOK LIEK GANGSTER.

BRA: NO I'M NOT. U BLIND?

ME: Then I realized you're like, totally NOT a gangster. I was flabbergasted.

BRA: Well you should be.

ME: Yes I should be. And you were so very fierce. Like a tiger. Which is awesome, at times.

BRA: Now you try being the Head of Cleanliness. I'll enjoy your suffering.

ME: But you were nice as well. Hell, you made me spend RM30 per month on SMS alone.

BRA: I KNOW I AM AWESOME. See, I made you learn to type faster on your iPhone's keypad.

ME: Well thanks for that, mr. alien. And when I heard you like Gaga, and your English is awesome, I instantly thought you were awesome.

BRA: Why thank you mortal. Without me you wouldn't have such awesome English. And you would've been stupider, period.

ME: I see. Well this conversation is getting stupid. I shall end this. Goodbye, alien. *mic explodes*

So yeah, what an introduction. Well that actually summarizes this new friend I made, who is one of the few friends who care about me.

FINE THIS POST IS GETTING BORING. I SHALL CONTINUE THAT FREAKING INTERVIEW.

ME: Hi again alien. Thanks for being there for me when I was going through hell.

BRA: Hi again mortal. I'm glad we aliens can help you mortals in such a delightful way.

ME: Wait, why are you an alien again?

BRA: Because I am. U JELLY?

ME: YES ME JELLY. So yeah, once again thanks for being my best friend, alien. Do try to control your anger at times though, I don't want anymore mortals abducted to Mars.

BRA: I'M FROM ****ING PLUTO. NOT MARS. Well yeah guess I should try that.

ME: So yeah, whatever, byes. Me lub u.

BRA: Me no lub u. Shoo.

(this entire convo is freaking fake for your information. No offense meant to anyone)

Thanks bra. Friends forever, yeah?